When I'm 35

At 19....this is what (so far) I have though about in my life. I sometimes say that oh when I'm older I'm going to do this and that. I want to be a particular kind of person later in life.

So this is a letter to self...that I should read at 35.

I hope that Jesus is still your number 1 in all aspects of life. As when you were 19, God reminded you so many times that He is first and you're ultimate calling here in Earth is to serve Him. Do you still realize that or have you gotten caught up with other things? Do you still make it to church on Friday nights, or even Wednesdays. Do you teach Sunday school? Have you gotten together with friends to sing a song in church recently, to serve God and the people? Or do you say, oh that was done when I was young. No time, no need now. Do you sit back and watch things happen? Do you care for the orphans at your church? Do you love them, and invite them over and be a good role model? When you were 19 you saw families do just that and oh how you respected them, saying that is what you would like to do. Do you give? When you were 19 you said you would buy a smaller house even if you could afford a bigger/better one because you'd be able to give more.

I hope that you love teaching as much as you did when you were 19. I hope it hasn't become "a job" that you have to go to, but rather LOVE to go to because you want to be there. I hope you invest a lot of your time into it as you planned when you were 19, because you want and love to serve "your kids" as I'm sure you're calling them. I hope you have the patience with them, unlike a lot of what you have heard from other students in your Inquiry to Learning class, back in the day. I hope you still see each child as an unique individual that God placed into your classroom for a reason. Do you still ask God to give you the ability to teach in a way that students understand?

Do you love your family? At 19 you said you already love your children (even though you didn't have them)! Are you a good mother. Friends used to tell you, you would be, but is that so? Are you patient? Are you kind? Do you invest time into them for them to get to know the Lord?! At 19 you knew that you would probably be the mom that did everything for your kids, even though they could do it themselves. You always thought you'd be the mom that wasn't too strict...although some friends (Olga-will have to remember this name!) thought you would be. At 19 you didn't know how many children you wanted...3 you always said...but 7 would do just fine :) Do you remember wanting to adopt? Sometimes you'd cry when you see precious faces of children without homes. Are you a stay at home mom? As much as you loved teaching, if you had the opportunity to stay home with your kids you would take it!

Do you love your husband? Are you even married? If you are...are you controlling, as you thought you would be back at 19 because you always had so many little siblings to watch after and that characteristic grew on you. Not controlling in a bad way hopefully... I think it's as though you feel like you have to do everything for everyone...you always said it would be scary to go through stumbling blocks in a marriage. You said if you'd be the one with disagreements in your marriage, you would humble yourself and say, "have it your way." Is that so?

Do you still LOVE to cook? Or have you become lazy? Do you try to be the best homemaker you could possibly be? Do you bring meals to other families when, lets say they had a baby, or are sick. Do you offer to help friends out? Maybe babysitting their kids, serving in any way you could. Do you invite people over? Do you give your guests the best that you have? Or do you wait to be invited over in order to invite someone...I hope you don't do good deeds expecting something in return. I hope your good deeds come from your heart as a way you serve Jesus. Do you love shopping? Dressing all cute, but being conscious of a budget...do you coupon? At 19 you got sick of it...didn't care for it too much. You still loved good deals on clothes though.

Do you have healthy relationships with friends? Do you stay in contact with the friends from when you were 19? Or you have drifted apart....its as though you are strangers. It would be cool if you held "girls nigh out" and Bible studies with your friends. Are you a good friend? At 19 many times you thought, oh I wish I was a better person. Do you still strive to be a better person?! Do you trust God with EVERYTHING? That was so hard for you as a teen.

At 19 on a Wednesday night, because of this post you are going to be running to choir. You still have to shower and get ready. It's mid week. November. Busy in school, but you try so hard to stay active in your church.

Are you always busy in a good way? What are you doing on a Wednesday November night at 35? I hope its not "doing nothing." I hope its serving God, your family, or your students.

Blessings,
Lesya

P.S. Readers you should do this too!! (I got this idea from another blog as well)